Yesterday I Cried

Yesterday,, Dana and I decided to take some well needed time for ourselves, hired a babysitter, and went on a date. We used one of the gift certificates we got for Christmas (I love food gc's) and went for dinner at a local resturant, Bacados. It was very yummy. I have been trying to watch my diet by eating no chocolate, nothing caffeniated, and absolutely no dairy (I always pay for it later). So far I have been doing pretty good. I had salmon with rice and steamed veggies, with water to drink. I even skipped dessert and for those of you who know me, know that that is a HUGE deal. Anyways, Dana recommended a movie after and we usually always go to an action one as we find those are the most worth while to see in the theatre, but yesterday Dana was feeling generous and decided to take me to Hilary Swank's new movie "PS. I Love You". It was a touching story about a woman who lost her Irish husband to a brain tumor, how she grieves and eventually falls in love again. There were several points where I was balling, the scene where she was packing up all his stuff, the scene where she remembers the first time they met, the kareoke scene.... actually I think there were tears in my eyes for most of the movie. I even looked over to Dana to see a few tears periodically. I think the reason why it affected me so much is that it put things into perspective. Our little fights, the little ways I disrepect Dana, the little things that I make into big things, just everything. I walked away from that movie not wanting to let go of this man I love in fear that one day I may have to live without him. How would I even breath without him? Is that even possible? Needless to say I was pretty emotional, and feeling very 'in love' with Dana for the rest of the night. I love movies like that, that make us feel. Make us grow. Make us laugh or cry. Think about our existance. Brings humanity back into our lives. I asked Dana what he thought of the movie, thinking that he would be sharing these whimsical feelings I am having. I looked at him and there were some tears rolling down his cheek. Me, thinking he was thinking how precious I was to him, reached over and brushed them away. He looked at me and said, "It made me think of my mom, and I really miss her." ...... Urrrrrccccch! What??? Your mother???? Now, don't get me wrong, I think it is very sweet that he admitted this because the last few months has been really hard on him and I think he has been denying himself how much he misses his mom and so it is good that he is finally verbalizing it. And I am sure when Carleen reads this she will cry too and feel touched to know this (and also know that it has been hard on everyone), but I have to admit I was feeling a little 'jipped'! Here I was, having all these whimsical thoughts about Dana and he wasn't even thinking of me. But, again, that is life. Unpredictable. Everyone reads movies, experiences, differently. And every emotion prevoked is valid. We spent the entire drive home talking about what we missed about 'home' and why. It has actually been discussed even since then what our goals are. Anyway, points I wanted to convey" 1. Good Movie 2. We miss family 3. Love movies that make us pervoke emotion.

In other big news, Ava is crawling!!!! Army crawling, but crawling no less. And she is motoring. I guess I have to keep the carpet clean as she is picking little crumbs up everywhere (and I thought I was a good housekeeper), but it is amazing what babies can find on a perfectly spotless floor. So yay Ava!!!